This is a horrifying story, but funny and completely relatable. In this essay, Sedaris tells of a time that he and his sister Amy went to a friend's house in Chicago for Easter Sunday. He excused himself to go to the bathroom and upon entering the bathroom, encountered an extremely large, solid matter looking back at him from the bowl. He attempts to flush it several times, but it is more than the toilet could handle. He doesn't want to leave it and be blamed for it, but someone begins knocking on the door. In desperation, he finds the plunger and "breaks it up" so that it will finally flush.
He panics that the other guests will blame him for the giant poop, but tries to remind himself of the talk his mother had with him as a child; Everybody poops. This does nothing to calm him down. To think of other people, friends, family, etc pooping grosses out the average person. We all assume that other people feel the same way and don't want to acknowledge that we poop.
At the end, he concludes that the real pooper didn't care, so why should he? I think that people should care, just because it is a natural thing that everyone must do does not make it appropriate publicly, the act, the view or discussion of the topic. It doesn't stand alone, most matters of personal hygiene, grooming and bodily functions should all be kept private.
My aunt told a very similar story to Sedaris and I'm still not sure if it was true, half true, or completely fiction. The only difference is that she knew exactly who it was, since he had called her in to witness it (he also took pictures, that they still have) and in that situation, they ended the day with one less kitchen utensil. BTW, I now use an electric mixer to make mashed potatos because I just can't bear to think about using a potato masher.
At several of my past jobs, there would only be one bathroom and 1-3 people working at any given time. This led to quite a few situations similar to "Big Boy." If someone left something, you were pretty sure you knew who it was and that is a disturbing, intrusive thought to have while trying to work and chat with that person. On the other hand, if someone else just left the place stinky, or on the rare occasions we might let a customer use the bathroom and stink 
it up - you're left wondering whether the smell might be blamed on you and even if you are lucky enough for the existance of air freshner in that bathroom - sometimes all that means is that the room will smell like well-fertilized flowers. Of course, you might think of a third option of embarrassing bathroom situations, but I'm a girl and everyone knows girls don't poop.
it up - you're left wondering whether the smell might be blamed on you and even if you are lucky enough for the existance of air freshner in that bathroom - sometimes all that means is that the room will smell like well-fertilized flowers. Of course, you might think of a third option of embarrassing bathroom situations, but I'm a girl and everyone knows girls don't poop.
2 comments:
Oh - and I meant not appropriate to discuss, unless it's academically. And sometimes with siblings, but it should only be immature jokes, not true discussion.
Good post, Patricia. This is a great short essay/story (whatever it is). I laughed out loud reading this one. It's like, what do you do in a situation like this one? We've all been there. I'm like David Sedaris, in that, I'm neurotic as hell. If I were to come across a big turd in a toilet and if it wouldn't flush, I'd freak out. Yet, I'm sure at some point I'd have to come out of the bathroom saying: Somebody shit and didn't flush. I will not be blamed for something I didn't do. I'll take people down with me. That's how I roll.
Sedaris' reaction is great. He starts to panic thinking of ways to get rid of the dookie. At one point, he thinks he'll pick it up out of the toilet (with his hands) and throw it out the window. Hilarious. Even funnier is what stops him from doing that: what if they find the human poo outside or someone sees it being thrown out the window?
You mention how some things shouldn't be discussed. Such things as bodily functions and the like. Should people like Sedaris not write a story about poop? We all talk about inappropriate things. I mean, I don't want to be eating lunch with my grandmother and hear her talking about her bowel movements. I swear all that woman ever talks about are her bowels and it's usually around the dinner table. And if I ever write a play about the woman, her 'character' will talk about her bowel movements ad nauseum.
People and poop. Yeah, it's one of those things you really don't talk about. I know people that do. And well, it's like, stop it. But wait a second: Your aunt has pictures of a poo?
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